Clayfighter: Sculptor's Cut

Released only to Blockbuster Video for rental by Interplay Productions on May 15, 1998, Clayfighter: Sculptor's Cut is a slightly updated version of 1997's fighter, Clayfighter 63 1/3.

Interplay's 1997 Nintendo 64 fighter, Clayfighter 63 1/3, didn't exactly set the world on fire. In truth, while it sold okay, the game is lousy. The developers obviously felt it could use some work too, as they released an updated version in an attempt to fix some of the original's problems, just eight months later. This version, titled Clayfighter: Sculptor's Cut, was only released to Blockbuster Video as a rental, resulting in it eventually becoming one of the rarest and most valuable games for the console...quite a feat for a game that's only marginally less lousy than the original Clayfighter 63 1/3.
 
Though at least the new start screen doesn't burn my eyes

Clayfighter 63 1/3 features several major problems. The game's graphics, 2D sprites created with stop-motion and claymation animation, don't look the best, and its 3D fighting arenas look even worse. The character models are cleaned up and look a bit better in Sculptor's Cut. The arenas are maybe a bit cleaner looking, but still quite muddy and blurry. They still feature that cool aspect where a fight can go through a door, and into another section of the arena, but this time, my game never froze when it happened. There are new arenas in addition to some of the returning ones from 63 1/3. There are also some character additions and subtractions...but who cares. This game still sucks.
 
Yay, this really ugly secret lair environment contains a humorous object

63 1/3's main issue is that the fighting engine and game movement is sluggish and frustrating. It is marginally of the smallest marginallys smoother here, but the game is only that same tiny margin more fun to play. Whether single-player or two-player mode, you're still going to be pressing buttons and then at moments watching your character performing the inputted actions seconds afterward. There's parrying and combos and special moves, and to actually enjoy performing them requires a fine-tuned control system and game engine that Sculptor's Cut just doesn't feature. The game doesn't work as anything more than a button masher. I again found myself just spamming the heavy punches and kicks until I won.
 
Does life have meaning?

The biggest updates here come in the non-gameplay department. The menus look far more professional and clean. The character select scene has comic-book like portraits for each character and looks quite nice. The start screen now features an opening song, replete with goofy lyrics. It's not great, but it's something. On the "just the same" line of quality, the music is still fun, and Danny Elfman-esque, and the voice-acting cast is still top notch, even if what they are saying is utter stupidity. Some of the characters, like Kong Pow, are still inexcusably offensive. Hey, there are four more of them, at least! Woohoo!
 
Yay!...? 

Sculptor's Cut is a bit like lip gloss on a cadaver. Shiny new menus. A new theme song. Slightly smoother graphics. But underneath, a fighting engine that still doesn't work well, and gameplay that isn't very fun. I'm sure that's somewhat analogous to a dead body, and my simile is great. Or it sucks. Like Clayfighter: Sculptor's Cut. Don't spend hundreds or thousands of dollars on this game. If you're an N64 completionist (like this very reviewer), there's no shame in buying a $20 repro instead. Under no circumstances is this musty corpse of a game worth more than that much of your hard-earned cash.
 
I don't know exactly what is going on in this picture, but I think it about sums up the Clayfighter games on this console


4.5
Graphics
The stop-motion 2D characters look okay if a little off-putting, but move sluggishly through the game's muddy 3D environments.
6.5
Music and Sound
Pretty fun, Danny Elfman-esque music, good voice-acting spouting bad lines, and sound effects happen.
3.6
Gameplay
2D fighting that's rarely fun, and often a slow, unresponsive mess.
2.9
Lasting Value
Turn it on, have a marginally bad time, then turn it off.

3.7 FINAL SCORE

Comments

Popular Posts